Hmm, that sounds a little dodgy… let me explain:
Untappd, for the uninitiated, is an app that allows users to catalogue their beers. Where they’re from; the style; where they’re consumed; what alcohol level they are (%ABV); the level of bitterness (IBU), etc.
It’s an important app for any beer lover – you really DO need to capture every single drop of amber goodness. And not just so you can catalogue for your own memory, but so you can earn badges and lord it over your mates – I totally get it!
He doesn’t even know I’ve taken these photos.
But I’ve noticed it’s starting to have an impact. I’ve come to the realisation that I am, in fact, an Untappd Wife. This is evidenced by the following observations.
- I’m not allowed to take a sip from my beer until it’s been photographed. It needs to be positioned in the light, and preferably in such a way that the light is harnessed to allow maximum gold to shine through. It could earn the low-hanging fruit (yet all-important, obviously), “Photogenic Brew” badge.
- When I can touch my beer, I need to help identify its sensory attributes. Is it rich and malty, or light and fruity? Is it bitter or smooth? Does it finish too quickly, or linger too long? And, certainly not one for the faint-hearted, what type of hops are being used?
- Once described, I lose all contact with Adam while he types his tasting notes and provides a rating. I may be asked to assist with the rating by answering how “true to style” and enjoyable the ale is.
Once rated and ranked, there is a critical moment of waiting to see if any badges are awarded. The outcome of these few moments can make or break a round of drinks. If no badges are awarded, this could have a detrimental effect on the rest of the social outing. I’ve learned I must quickly create a topic of conversation to distract from any such “failure”.
It’s ok, it really is just a few minutes of time. Each beer. Every round. I’ll manage. I guess I’m lucky I actually like beer.
I’m learning that a happy Untappd Husband means a happy… life. But I’m wondering if there are any other Untappd Wives out there…? We might need to start a support group.
Oh, you are not alone. It gets worse, too: I introduced him to Untappd on our first date. We now take vacations around his desire for more badges. I created a monster.
I too am an untapped wife. I laughed at this because I agree completely with what you’ve written. Spot on!
Haha, I loved this! I’m an Untappd girlfriend & would love join some sort of ladies of Untappd support group :] (also, what’s your Untappd username??)
I work for Untappd for Business and I have lots of stickers I could send you if you’d like :]
Ah I misread this completely! DERP.
My boyfriend and I are probably both “Untappd Husbands”
Ha! Brilliant! Do you compete for badges?
With my boyfriend mostly! I plan drinking around badges…and now that I’ve typed it out…that sounds absurd! Haha!
Sounds very familiar, Ashlie. We do the same!
Omg my fiancée got a light box just to photog beer! This. Is. My. Life. I heart you!
Hear** lol
My wife was an Untappd Wife but then she joined and we have a blast together. You should join.
That’s a great idea… but we’re super competitive, so it could get nasty 😉 ha ha
I love this! My husband co-founded Untappd so believe me… I can relate. Sign me up for the support group. 😂
Ha ha wow! I’m sure you have a whole other level of Untappd husband-ness to deal with 😂😂😂
I lovingly refer to my husband as a ‘badge whore’. Thanks Untapped!
Tee hee, love it!
Love this write up! My poor boyfriend is actually the “Untapped Wife” in our relationship lol I am a total badge hunting, beer photographing, brewery travelling IPA lover! Good thing you love beer, it’s something to do together and get a little laugh out of 🙂
That’s awesome, Lola! I must admit, when I first found out there were badges, I did take more of an interest 🙂 It is definitely still a fun thing we laugh at.